GOD! So, since we're on the subject of me being EMO!! i just have to say that i have been dealing with this ridiculous work situation... blah!
ok, so basically if you know me very well at all then you know that i work at the magic show, the magic of polynesia staring john hirokawa, el espectaculo del magico. i really love working there, i like the people i work with, i like what i have to do, and i like that i can capitalize on the fact that people come to the magic show to have fun and be entertained, i especially like that i know that many peoples idea of fun and entertainment is getting drunk, i know that's my idea!! so i get to capitalize on that at a place where fun is inherent anyways! i like that, i like my job. i wouldn't have stayed there for two years if i didn't think it was a good fit for me.
the thing is, recently...my manager has completely turned on me! i knew that i have never been her number one favorite or anything like that, i've never killed the sales the way other people who work there can do, i can't speak japanese and i apparently don't have any really extra special attributes to the job....well..actually i have always been really good at squeezing the dollars out of the white man...but lately i haven't even been able to do that because my manager has like launched this personal vendetta against me and i really don't know where it is coming from or why!!
it just sucks because the worst part about it is the way she is making me feel with her negativity, i just feel like i am here, trying to be a good employee and doing my best to make money with what i have to work with and doing the best that i can, and there she is trying to cut me down in anyway possible...and she's the manager! she has authority over shit! she gives me shitty fucking sections that could not possibly make money and then berates me for not making enough money...she purposefully sets me up so i look bad and then makes me feel like a total retard for not being "as good" or whatever...i don't get it...i totally don't even know what i did to deserve this.
i guess that i just have to confront her. if i go one more day of work feeling like a totally worthless asshole i just wont be able to stand it anymore...it's really making me stress, and it's not cool for someone that i should respect to make me feel worthless and unimportant...i need to be stronger than that and stick up for myself...i truly feel that if i confront her with the idea that i feel like she wants me to quit, she will find some reason to tell me that i shouldn't quit, she knows she needs me on staff and if she knows that her behavior makes me feel like i should quit, then hopefully that will make her want to change it...and if it doesn't, then maybe i really should just quit...
ah man..i want school to start...
ok, so basically if you know me very well at all then you know that i work at the magic show, the magic of polynesia staring john hirokawa, el espectaculo del magico. i really love working there, i like the people i work with, i like what i have to do, and i like that i can capitalize on the fact that people come to the magic show to have fun and be entertained, i especially like that i know that many peoples idea of fun and entertainment is getting drunk, i know that's my idea!! so i get to capitalize on that at a place where fun is inherent anyways! i like that, i like my job. i wouldn't have stayed there for two years if i didn't think it was a good fit for me.
the thing is, recently...my manager has completely turned on me! i knew that i have never been her number one favorite or anything like that, i've never killed the sales the way other people who work there can do, i can't speak japanese and i apparently don't have any really extra special attributes to the job....well..actually i have always been really good at squeezing the dollars out of the white man...but lately i haven't even been able to do that because my manager has like launched this personal vendetta against me and i really don't know where it is coming from or why!!
it just sucks because the worst part about it is the way she is making me feel with her negativity, i just feel like i am here, trying to be a good employee and doing my best to make money with what i have to work with and doing the best that i can, and there she is trying to cut me down in anyway possible...and she's the manager! she has authority over shit! she gives me shitty fucking sections that could not possibly make money and then berates me for not making enough money...she purposefully sets me up so i look bad and then makes me feel like a total retard for not being "as good" or whatever...i don't get it...i totally don't even know what i did to deserve this.
i guess that i just have to confront her. if i go one more day of work feeling like a totally worthless asshole i just wont be able to stand it anymore...it's really making me stress, and it's not cool for someone that i should respect to make me feel worthless and unimportant...i need to be stronger than that and stick up for myself...i truly feel that if i confront her with the idea that i feel like she wants me to quit, she will find some reason to tell me that i shouldn't quit, she knows she needs me on staff and if she knows that her behavior makes me feel like i should quit, then hopefully that will make her want to change it...and if it doesn't, then maybe i really should just quit...
ah man..i want school to start...
