Ode to the Most Amazing Roommate in the World!

i've just been inspired.

and because of this i just have to say that i could never have dreampt of being able to live with a cooler person than jackie...she takes care of me the way i've ever wanted anyone else to. and she wants to, she want to be there for me in ways that no other people have ever cared to be for me...it's amazing...she gives me cash when i am broke and she buys me food all the time, we talk out our problems and tell eachother every detail about our days and can just unwind everything to eachother...i never even have to ask for anything from her because she just wants to be there for me, and if i ever need anything she never makes me ashamed to ask for it.

it's so amazing that i can rely on a friend like that...i know this might sound incredibly dumb but she did the coolest thing for me today as my "early birthday present" which she has been loudly trying to hide from me for the last couple weeks trying to get my hopes up....it's kinda stupid but it meant so much to me...hah...she bought me a bong as my early birthday present and gave it to me this afternoon, but i didn't have anything to smoke out of it and i was kinda bummed..so i left to hang out with my friend camilla and told her about the new bong and she said she could pack some herb in it later, but when we got to my house she showed me how much she had and it totally wasn't even enough to get one person high....so i was even more bummed about that cuz i didn't want the first smoke out of my new bong to not even get anyone high! that's such a bad omen for a bong! the first bowl needs to be such a fatty that everyone who smokes it gets so blazed and is like "damn that's a sweet new bong!".....as i'm thinking this, i look over at the area where i keep the bong and i see a little bag of weed that jackie left for me...for me to smoke out of my brand new bong...for me to get superblazed the first time i ever smoke out of my brand new bong that she bought me...awwwwww....and i did! i know its kind of a random thing to get rediculously excited about....but she just knew me so well, better than i ever even knew...i never thought i could have been so excited to find a bag of weed....hah! it's crazy how sometimes something so small can make you look at the bigger picture

i guess i could just say that i am lucky and a half to have such a laid back and awesome person in my life and the part thats really amazing is that she's only the most awesome, i also know so many other awesome people that could give her a run for her money...and i luckily feel that i do my part to be the same for those people...how could i not? i hopefully try to assert myself strongly in making my friends feel as happy for having me as a friend as i feel for them...reciprocity man...balance! hah! you caught me this time justice...you are one kick ass bitch!

anyways...this thanksgiving i am thankful for my roommate...things never could be better between us....now i just wish i could find a way to show her my grattitude...ooh man i'll have to think this one out!!

The Scales of Justice

i feel like between now and the last time i posted on here my life has been subjected to an unstable balance beam

so many times have i thrown out the idea of balance and i am now so convinced that it is something i will need to learn about and challenge throughout the course of my entire life!!!

i often get this sensation that i am a little metal pinball and some kind of giant pinball machine is tossing me back and forth between the little flippers and some unseen force is nudging the machine in it's particular preference of direction. then i think that justice, without ever having seen me, tosses my little pinball between her scales and i'm liable to just fly away at that point and never be heard from again.........but she catches me.

and oh yeah to being caught. people can find me, and people can know me, people can love me and people can get annoyed by me, people can think that i bring a smile to their face and people can not stand the presence of me. but no one will ever catch me. will they?